Morning is not my friend. I have Fibromyalgia and, unlike most people for whom sleep is refreshing, for me it is like trying to move the day after a fender bender. You aren't exactly in traction, but every muscle hurts. Some days, my hair hurts. But that's a topic for another day.
You see, if it wasn't for my "zoo" I would probably just stay in bed all day. I am grateful for the little (and not so little) mouths I must feed. Even on those days when it kills me to move, I have to. They're counting on me. It's when there are extra surprises for me that I wonder why I don't just rehome everybody and get a plant.
If my writing seems disjointed it's because this morning has been one of those crazy ones. I have been up and down, stopping fights, unlocking the cat door and cleaning up. Something is in the air. I can feel it.
With my cats, I can tell by their body language when something is up. For example,I know when somebody has caught a lizard, and I have to spring into action to save it. (I am NOT pc when it comes to cat hunting. If they want to bring me a palm frond they think is a snake, fine. But a poor lizard hanging from the jaws of death must be rescued. Sorry, oh great cat god.) I can also tell when someone has done a dirty deed and the others want me to find out about it. Like, peeing on the dog's bed.
Yes, somebody peed on Jack's bed. If you are unfamiliar with the properties of cat pee, it is something akin to radioactive waste. The stuff can never, in your lifetime, be destroyed. I will never attempt to put anything with cat pee on it in my washing machine. My husband would chuck the lot of us if his dress shirts reeked of cat pee. Soooo, the dog bed and body pillow Jack used went to the curb. I hid behind the curtain and watched when the trash collectors came by to see if they took the stuff or left it with a note attached : "Please do not ever leave toxic waste for us. Call HazMat and dispose of it properly."
Now, you would think Jack would be upset that his bed got tossed but, no. It is just another excuse for him to sleep on the couch.
After the pee mystery faded, the real fun began. It started with low growls. Then I heard the scritching sounds, signifying claws were being activated and sharpened for battle. (Keep in mind, I am on my fifth cup of coffee and trying to concentrate on writing.) Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a white, fuzzy, flash fly by. Then a black one. Next, I saw a ball of black and white that resembled the Yin and Yang symbol - only there was nothing Zen about this mess. Black and white fur was flying; yowls were being emitted and spit was everywhere. Thankfully, no blood. As a side note: Jack was calmly sleeping inches away from the melee. Not that long ago, he would come undone whenever a spat broke out. Now, meh.
Normally, Eli and Fancy are the two vying for top position. However, Eli was up on the counter, calmly grooming his left leg. Chance was running around the scene, looking like Barney Fife trying to find his one bullet! Rooney was watching the action out the front window, clutching her teddy bear and wishing her Dad would come home. The two involved in the fracas were Fancy and Finn - the most loveable creature on the planet. In Twitter speak: WTH; SMH and FP.
I will get to the bottom of this. Until I do, they're all out on the porch. I just hope nobody gets "accidentally" pushed into the pool.
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