Well, it's been a busy morning. It took me two hours to complete my "chores" and by nine I was exhausted. It all started with, of all things, trash....
Our county has gone to a new system of once weekly trash collection. They provided two, 95 gallon bins for each household - one for trash and one for recycled items. Now, the lid for the garbage is green and the one for recyclables is blue. Personally, I would have done it the other way around, but nobody asked me. And, those suckers are heavy.
Ninety five gallons heavy.
For some reason, known only to him, and despite there being large signs on each bin, which one is for trash, etc., Andy switched the contents. In one of my weird, woo hoo moments, I discovered this. Good thing, too, because we would have probably gotten a fine or something for having our junk in the wrong bins. Or worse - they may have just left the trash till next week - to get even riper. I had two choices - 1) ignore it and let the chips fall where they may - or - 2) remove the contents from both and put the stuff in the correct bins.
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| REPEAT AFTER ME: GREEN IS FOR GARBAGE BLUE IS FOR BOTTLES! |
Even though I want so badly to go through life "letting the chips fall..." I just can't bring myself to do it. Ever. It really ticks me off, too. I am the one picking up your trash when you haphazardly miss the wastebasket. I'm the one picking up the things that fall off the shelves in the grocery store, even though twelve people have ignorantly rolled around it. Maybe it's a throwback to having kids. I am the one person cleanup crew.
Anyway, I swore a bit (well, okay, a lot) then set about the task of switching trash around. Did I mention these are 95 - NINETY FIVE - gallon bins?
I managed to remove the recycle stuff without much difficulty. However, the trash part posed a problem. You see, I do not possess monkey arms. Mine are average length for a 5'2 woman. I simply could not reach the bottom of the bin without tipping it over. So, I tried.
This was not easy. I eventually managed to use the fact it was on a slanted driveway to my advantage and pulled the trash bin down. Did I mention there was about a foot of water in the bottom of it? Yeah. Gross, disgusting water from when it rained last week which, when the bin fell, poured over my bare feet. Oh, but my ordeal was far from over.
I still had to crawl into the bin to retrieve the last two stubborn bags which just so happened to be cat litter waste. Heavy bags of wet, stinky cat poo and pee, all nasty from having been in the bottom of the bin for a week.
If Andy had appeared at that moment, I would have used my last ounce of strength to sign divorce papers. I was so mad. To make matters worse, I have a bone spur in my shoulder that has been causing me problems lately. As in making my whole arm tingle and go numb. It also hurts like hell.
Anyway, I survived the ordeal, aided by lots of expletives, and felt content knowing the trash guys would not hate us today. I made my way into the house only to smell the distinctive aroma of lizard poop. I guess it's been three days? I was happy she pooped; grossed out cause I'm the designated pooper scooper. However, this was not a simple scoop job. No, it was way more complicated.
Copper has been growing a lot which means she is also shedding her skin - like a snake. It can be alarming to see this, especially when it looks like she is growing another head. I don't know - you'd have to see it. For the past couple of days she has been losing the skin on her head - quick Bearded Dragon lesson: Those spikey things that look like teeth grow, too, and slough off right along with their skin. Today, her entire under belly was sloughing off. That meant, when she pooped, the skin was kinda caught up in it. I decided she needed a bath.
Convincing a dog or cat you aren't trying to kill them when you are giving them a bath is hard enough. I have even bathed a reluctant horse. A reptile, who sort of knows you, but quickly forgets you're on their side, is never gonna get the concept of running water over their body. Predictably, she panicked as soon as I put her under the stream of water.
I decided to switch tactics and got a cloth to wipe her with. She has spikes all over her body. Spikes that caught on every fiber of the cloth. That brainstorm was trashed. Finally, I just said, "We're doing this." and turned her slightly on her back and ran the water over her tummy. She liked it! I was in shock. She relaxed and let me clean her off then wrap her in a towel - which she also liked. Who knew?
Oh, and to add to my anxiety level, Boo! caught a lizard. Well, I'm not really sure if she caught it or found it because it was in bad shape. It's eyes were gone, which usually means it's been dead awhile. But it seemed like it was still alive. Maybe she was making it look alive. She can do that with a piece of lint. Anyway, I retrieved it and examined it, but still couldn't tell what was up. So, I disposed of it. A lizard can live without its tail but eyes are another matter. Gosh, the decisions I have to make around here.
I was a wreck, but felt like I accomplished something. My days used to be filled with teaching and organizing and paperwork. It was exhausting but meaningful work because it was all about caring for people in need. These days, I find my work in caring for animals so much more rewarding. People can articulate their gratitude with words - although few do. Animals cannot speak but their actions speak volumes. And they are always grateful.
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