I've been trying to write but, for some reason, Eli is in a mood. While I was attempting to entice Dash out of my bedroom using his favorite toy, all of the other guys were waiting at the door to push in. I just rolled my eyes and let them have at it. Some days I just don't feel like herding cats. So now, all I can hear is hissing, spitting and chuffing. In case you aren't familiar with that word, it is a huffing/chortle sound my cats make when they're annoyed. Sort of like blowing air through your nose in short bursts, with your mouth open. I'm only an expert on my cats so I don't have a clue if this a universal cat thing or not.
I had to laugh when Mr. E came strolling out of the room; satisfied he had done what he set out to do - which was to get everybody else worked up. I walked into the room to find a pile of black and white fur, and in the middle of it - Finn and Fancy! Nobody fights with Finn! He's a big marshmallow (lizards would disagree!) and would rather groom somebody than fight with them. I told Fancy not to take out his anger with Eli on Finn. He listened, and walked away "chuffing." I think that sound really means, "Fine. I'll leave him alone - this time - but I'm so damn mad I have to take it out on somebody! Maybe I'll eat something instead..." Hmmmmm
What I intended to write about is not a funny subject. But it's been bothering me and I want to address it. It has to do with people not understanding Animal Body Language.
(FOR THE LOVE OF PETE THERE'S A WAR GOING ON UNDER MY BED!!! I'LL BE BACK! Twenty minutes later, after literally herding cats out of my room, where they get territorial, and cleaning up the backyard, cause the lawn guys are due to arrive, I am back at the computer.)
Okay, where was I? Oh yes, Animal Body Language. Sadly, too many people don't bother to research or interpret it, and bad things happen. For example: I adore Fancy. I believe he would never intentionally hurt me. But he has, unintentionally. I can never forget he was a stray - or perhaps feral. There are degrees of feral, so it's possible he is of a lower degree, therefore capable of becoming a housecat. However, years later, he still has the fight or flight thing going on. We can be cuddling on the chair (his head must always be to the front where he can see potential danger coming) and the slightest thing can send him hurtling off my lap through the air. Like Andy tossing me the remote or a sneeze. I have gotten scratched so many times, I've lost count. Never bitten, though. I have learned how to read his body language.
Fancy let me know from the start he doesn't like it when I touch or groom his back legs. I don't push it. He loves to have his head and neck rubbed. I can massage his paws, sometimes. He draws the line at his back legs. He looks like a Wooly Mammoth back there. Now what kind of stupid would I be if I forced the issue? Yet people will try to push their will on their cats and ignore the signs of distress - pupils dilated, ears back and fur up. Hissing comes next. Then a bite or a scratch. People will let children tease and annoy kittens and adult cats, then wonder why "Fluffy" scratched or bit "Sally." Cats have two defense mechanisms: teeth and claws. When Fancy was a kitten, and he let me near him outside, I had to remind him, "No teeth, no claws." He understood me. If I fail to see his stress markers, it's my fault, not his. Learn how to read when your cat is upset, then back off.
Dogs are different but the same. They show distress in different ways than cats, but they do show signs. A dog will pant and get a wild look in their eyes when they are upset. Being pack animals, dogs know the signs of dominance and aggression. For example, they hate it when people loom over them. And they aren't comfortable when a human face is right next to theirs.
Let me stop here for one exception. Rooney is the only dog I've ever known who wants your face right up against hers. She loves to be kissed. But, it's her idea. She is clearly happy and relaxed when she is getting kissed. We have learned to read her cues. Rooney also has no concept of "fetch." If she brings you one of her precious toys, the most insulting thing you can do is toss it away and say, "Go get it!" You will get a look that says, "I just brought that for you! Why did you throw it away? Don't you love me?" Body Language.
Rooney loves kisses! Rooney also loves to bring you her toys.
Last, but not least, is a caution about dog bites. I remember one horrible day when our grandson was a toddler. Their beloved dog was dying of cancer. She loved both of the kids but was ill. My grandson, being a typical little guy, ran up to her and jumped on her back. She was in so much pain, she just reacted in the only way she knew how - by biting him. In the face. It could have been a total nightmare but he was lucky. She caught his cheek, but not his eye. He was started on antibiotics right away and healed quickly. He has a tiny scar on his jaw to remind him not to jump on a dog. Any dog.
Bullmastiffs are known as Gentle Giants. They typically don't bite, but rather pin down an aggressor. They are sweet, patient dogs, but they are bred to be guard dogs. Our Jack weighs between 175 and 180 pounds, depending on how many treats he's managed to score. He's gentle and loving. But make no mistake - I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. Now, let me tell you why. I am protecting Jack from himself as well as protecting any potential victims from him. I love that dog. I don't want him to get into a position where he thinks he has no choice but to do what comes naturally. Once a bite has happened there is no turning back the clock.
I know Jack is very protective of our whole family - especially the kids. This is why Jack hates chaos. He can't tell the difference between horseplay and genuine danger. If our son picks up our grandson and gives him a bear hug, Jack doesn't know if the giggles and squeals mean he's playing with or killing him. He immediately gets into position, trying to separate man and boy. His instincts are telling him he needs to intervene. It's his job and he takes it very seriously. Then he looks to me for a directive. I can't punish him for doing what he was bred to do. So, as a responsible pet owner, I have to train him, but also be proactive. Sometimes I just have to put him somewhere where he feels less stress. That's my job.
Both of these pictures show the love Jack has for his kids. But we taught the kids how to love Jack in return.
Here are some wise things I've learned from trainers and breeders over the years:
Don't play tug-o-war. That means there is a winner and a loser.
Don't encourage "hand play." Hands are for petting, not for biting (especially with puppies and kittens.)
Don't let children abuse any animal by climbing on them, teasing them, or otherwise annoying them.
Don't let your dogs jump up on people. It is disrespectful. We have a strict "feet on the floor" policy here.
Do learn how to read the signs when your pet is in distress.
Do remove your pet from stressful situations, to prevent bites or scratches.
Do reward your pet for positive behavior.
Do love your pet enough to respect their boundaries.
If you love your family, and your pets, teach everyone respect. Shelters aren't full of little kids who got sent away because they teased the family dog and got bitten. No, shelters are filled with sad, abandoned pets who don't know what they did wrong.
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